Sunday, December 14, 2014
1.You know those guys who post "women should stay in the kitchen" jokes on Facebook because they think making a controversial statement is funny? Or who don't think a woman can fix a light bulb? Or who have made claims that women can't be announcers on ESPN? Don't date those guys. They're all Sack Lodge (Bradley Cooper) from Wedding Crashers.
2.Manipulating your voice is major in the art of seduction (and apparently guys suck at it).
3. Dirty fingernails. I don’t care if you’re a builder, just use a nice bit of soap.
4. Wearing boxers with holes in. No.
5. What's with men and keeping pubic hair? Especially armpit.. Ewww!!!
6. Unsolicited back door entry.
Well you can add yours,
Thursday, December 11, 2014
Tuesday, December 9, 2014
Friday, December 5, 2014
Even in the pouring rain, he's there,
He'll take you anywhere, just hold your fare.
Before getting on the bus,
He'll scream "wole pelu change e o"
Then you try to get your balance by force,
He'll say " I go marry two people together o"
He could send you into peals of laughter
With jokes and endless banter
But never get too involved in his chatter,
Or you'd become the topic of the matter
If you doze off in the hold-up
Because the minute quiet feels nice
He'll take you past your bus stop,
Believe me man, without thinking twice.
Of course when you wake up,
You won't dare blame him,
He'll put it to you " na your bus stop
I go shout, no be your name
When you are with that bus conductor,
Don't get into an arguement with him.
Else you will learn vile words in his protector
With it his tongue is filled to the brim
Think you can out do him? Oh my!
He'll never miss his mark
Till he bids you goodbye
When the bus get to the park.
Written by Nanya Konwea
Twitter handle:@dahliadona. Like our page on facebook- Favourmoyseblog.
Nosakhare Favour Osayuwamen.
Thursday, December 4, 2014
perspective on the issues of gender violence -- they've been seen as women's issues that some
good men help out with, but I have a problem with that frame and I don't accept it. I don't see these as women's issues that some good men help out with. In fact, I think that these are men's issues.
Now obviously, they're also women's issues, so I
appreciate that, but calling gender violence a women's issue is part of the problem, for a lot of reasons.
The first is that it gives men an excuse not to pay attention. Right? A lot of men hear the term "women's issues" and they tend to tune it out, and think, "Hey, I'm a guy. That's for the girls," or "That's for the women." And a lot of men literally don't get beyond the first sentence as a result. It's almost like a chip in their brain is activated, and the neural pathways take their attention in a different direction when they hear the term "women's issues." This is also true, by the way, of the word "gender," because a lot of people hear the word "gender" and they think it means "women." So they think that gender issues is synonymous with women's issues.
So let's talk for a moment about race. In the U.S. when we hear the word "race," a lot of people think that means African-American, Latino, Asian-American, Native American, South Asian, Pacific Islander, on and on. A lot of people, when they hear the word "sexual orientation" think it means gay, lesbian, bisexual. And a lot of people, when they hear the word "gender," think it means women. In each case, the dominant group doesn't get paid attention to. Right? As if white people don't have some sort of racial identity or belong to some racial category or construct, as if heterosexual people don't have a sexual orientation, as if men don't have a gender. This is one of the ways that dominant systems maintain and reproduce themselves, which is to say the dominant group is rarely challenged to
even think about its dominance, because that's one of the key characteristics of power and privilege, the ability to go unexamined, lacking introspection, in fact being rendered invisible in large measure in the discourse about issues that
are primarily about them. And it is amazing how this works in domestic and sexual violence, how men have been largely erased from so much of the conversation about a subject that is centrally about men.
We don't help either by asking questions like, why do these women go out with these men? Why are they attracted to these men? Why do they keep going back? What was she wearing at that party? What a stupid thing to do. Why was she drinking with that group of guys in that hotel room? This is victim blaming. This isn't wrong as it is a legitimate thing to ask but we need to know that asking questions about women will not prevent gender violence. We need to ask a different set of questions like why do men abuse women? Why is domestic violence still a big problem in Nigeria and all over the world? Why do so many men abuse, physically, emotionally, verbally, and other ways, the women and girls, and the men and boys, that they claim to love? What's going on with men? Why do so many adult men sexually abuse little girls and little boys? Why is that a common problem in our society and all over the world today?And then what is the role of the various institutions in our
society that are helping to produce abusive men at pandemic rates? Because this isn't about individual perpetrators.What's the role of religious belief systems, the sports culture, the pornography culture, the family structure, economics, and how that intersects?
But one of the powerful roles that men can play in this issue is that they can say some things that sometimes women can't say, or, better yet, they can be heard saying some things that women often can't be heard saying.
Now, when it comes to men and male culture, the goal is to get men who are not abusive to challenge men who are. And when I say abusive, I don't mean just men who are beating women. And I'm not just saying a man whose friend
is abusing his girlfriend needs to stop the guy at the moment of attack. That's a naive way of creating a social change. It's along a continuum, Men should learn to interrupt each other. So, for example, if you're a guy and you're in a group of guys playing poker, talking, hanging out, no women present, and another guy says something
sexist or degrading or harassing about women, instead of laughing along or pretending you didn't hear it, we need men to say, "Hey, that's not funny. You know, that could be my sister you're talking about, and could you joke about something else? Or could you talk about something else? I don't appreciate that kind of talk.". Doing this we make the perpetrators lose status and if we can't get to that place a change begins because most male victims of violence are the victims of other men's violence. So that's something that both women and men have in common.
Now among the many great things that Martin Luther King said in his short life was, "In the end, what will hurt the most is not the words of our enemies but the silence of our friends." There's been an awful lot of silence in male culture about this ongoing tragedy of men's violence against women and children, hasn't there? And all I'm saying is that we need to break that silence, and we need more men to do that.
The responsibility for taking a stand on these issues should not fall on the shoulders of little boys or teenage boys in high school or college men. It should be on adult men with power. Adult men with power are the ones we need to be holding accountable for being leaders on these issues, because when somebody speaks up in a peer culture and challenges and interrupts, he or she is being a leader, really, right? But on a big scale, we need more adult men with power to start prioritizing these issues, and we haven't seen
that yet, have we?
I hope that, going forward, men and women, working together, can begin the change and the transformation that will happen so that future generations won't have the level of tragedy that we deal with on a daily basis.
I know we can do it. We can do better.
Twitter handle @dahliadona. Like our page on facebook: Favourmoyseblog.
Nosakhare Favour Osayuwamen
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
A group of Rhinos is called a rash.
A group of Kangaroos is called a mob .
A group of Whales is called a pod.
A group of Geese is called a gaggle.
A group of Fish is called a school.
A group of Owls is called a parliament.
A group of Crows is called a murder.
A group of Bats called a colony.
A group of Eagles is called a Congress.
A group of Giraffes is called a tower.
A group of Goats is called a tribe.
A group of Lions is called a pride.
A group of Horses is called a team.
A group of Rabbits is called a colony.
A group of Wolves is called a pack.
A group of Sharks is called a shiver.
A group of Cockroaches is called an intrusion
A group of Flies is called a business.
A group of Rats is called a mischief.
A group of Guinea Fowl is called a confusion.
The sons of Adolph Hitler's nephew made a pact to never have children, ending the Hitler bloodline. Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.
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Nosakhare Favour Osayuwamen
Saturday, June 28, 2014
It hard to get by in life and be truly happy when you have to worry about something as basic as being able to afford to go to a dentist. Money problems are one of the common reasons for couples divorce. So its unsuprising when someone wants to marry into money.
Here are simple ways to get exactly what you want.
1. Don't be the cliche
The beautiful ( silicon-augmented) girl which spends all day shopping or sitting by the pool. You don't want to be the trophy wife. Another side of the coin is when he knows you want him for the money ( he doesn't want an obvious gold digger).
2. Respect yourself.
Eat healthy, exercise, dress for success and practice good hygiene.
3. Get educated.
No man wants a total bimbo.
4. Get cultured.
Have a developed interest in music, art, literature, films. Understand and explore foreign cultures, history and politics too.
5. Do things with your life.
No one wants to be with someone who is completely shallow. Just an empty shell that does nothing.
6. Have talents
It makes you more interesting. The easiest route to go is to become a great cook.
7. Be passionate.
Be a passionate lover but also be that in how you live your life.
Finding your man
1. Catch him early
Frequent the bars and cafes around major medical and tech university. This will help you meet guys that are well on their wall to become IT overlords and doctors. If you meet him when he's young he will.ne more likely to be single and less worried that a woman is after him for money.
2. Frequent their hangouts.
Generallly go to places where rich men are likely to be.
3. Go to auction houses
4. Go to charity events
You don't have to donate to the charity you are attending the event for but donating something is probably a good idea
5. Work in the right place.
Statistics say 22% of married couples meet their spouse through work.
6. Make rich friends
7. Use services designed for this purpose.
There are lots of dating services, both online and in real life. Pick a reputable one and see where it leads.
Monday, June 23, 2014
Few weeks ago,it was all about the #iwokeuplikethis#nomakeup selfies. Celebrities and women flooded their facebook and instagram pages with bare faced photos, but the nation's latest social media trend looks more painful.
The "sellotape selfie" sees people using sellotape (scotch tape) to manipulate their faces into various unappealing contortions. This craze was started by student Lizzie Durley, who says she was inspired by the scene in the film "Yes Man" in which actor Jim Carrey takes to his face with tape. The idea has since gone viral.
Charity cancer research Uk received €1million in 24 hours after encouraging participants in the spontaneous #nomakeupselfie trend to donate money along with their selfies.
Socail network is more fun with stuffs currently trending. So incase you wanna try it out just remember to leave your nose out of it, provide space for air.
I don't like the grotesque images though.
Tags; FMB, sellotape, UK, charity cancer,Lizzie Durley,Jim Carrey,Yes Man
Wednesday, May 28, 2014
Avoid politics especially if the activities of our leaders always give you the arrgghhh!!!!moments. Don't worry, when politics start working again in Nigeria, your neighbour will tell you.
Don't watch, listen or read news headlines in the morning. You won't miss much anyway.
Don't take the threat of your landlord to heart. He's only doing his job
Never, I mean never date your boss. You give away the job you want to secure by doing that.
Clear all the I.O.U's in your life. The feeling that comes with paying your debt is priceless.
Listen to loads of music everyday. Not the type that shouts 'ukwu' or wants you to shake your bum bum. You can if that's your kind of music.
Watch tons of nollywood movies especially those produced by upper Iweka and Alaba moneybags.
Never visit the bank when your account is in the red, else you will develop instant Migraine.
Never fight with a conductor. You will lose both ways.
At all cost,avoid plying the roads popularly knowns as 'one way'
You see Ashi? Avoid them.
If you ride in public buses, see the driver and conductor as actors and fellow passengers as like people in the cinema with you.
As much as possible, mind your business.
Tags: FMB, cinema,bank,Upper Iweka,Alaba, Nollywood.
Twitter handle ; @dahliadona
Landing your man
1. Show them you are not in it for the money.
They need to see that you do really love them...and you should really love them. Relationships are hard, and they only work when you are bonded to that person.
2. Create an environment of trust.
Its common for them to be exploited so they might have trust issues. Create that environment.
3. Be a great date
Take active roles in your date. Take them places even if the place isn't very nice.
4. Bring fun into their life.
Everyone wants someone that will make their life better.
5. Love them hard and faithfully.
Be a master in the art of love. Not the sex part though. Be good at actually loving them and help them to fall in love with you.
6. Keep them coming back for more.
Don't give everything up all at once. Why should they marry you if having you as a girlfriend or mistress gets them what they want?
Rule out the fact that you cannot make money on your own.
Evaluate and be realistic about your looks, brains and personality.
Don't be too obvious
Act like a lady
And lastly carve out alone time for yourself and let him miss you. Get a life, have friends and tons of interest. Make yourself interesting and fun to be with.
Twitter handle; @dahliadona
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
THE NIGERIAN MUM: A CHEST OF SECRETS
I’m sure the C.I.A will be proud of them,with the secrets they keep. Squeezing info from them is like milking a barren cow. Most things you find out in your house is by:
2) Carrying out your own private investigation when no soul is at home. You can’t ask her her salary or your
father’s salary without her asking you back “Why do you want to know?”They surely answer all questions with questions
Q: Mum, how much did you buy that?
A: Do you want to pay me back?
Q: Is daddy coming back this night?
A: Why are you asking?
Q: Where is all the money the visitors have been giving me that I’ve been giving you to keep?
A: Don’t disturb me! All the food you have been eating, where is it coming from? You can never win them!
THE NIGERIAN MUM: THE GREAT AUDITOR
When you ask your mother for money, she mostly tells you to ‘go and ask your dad’. Sometimes, you think she’s cooperating with you when she whispers to you, “Now that he is with money, you better go and meet him” Please, never you make the mistake of taking this for cooperation because she is never far behind. She may pretend to be dressing the curtain in the bedroom or to be arranging your dad’s clothes but my dear, she is listening intently. The moment your dad is about to bring out the money or is showing interest in what you’re saying, she leaps in like a wolf “Ada, what do you say you’re doing with all that money sef” Or “Junior, I thought we bought you a bicycle before” Or simply “honey/papa Jasper, don’t spoil this boy! Allow him to learn how to save”.
Systematically creating element of doubt in your dad’s mind! And woe betide you, if you’re given that money, don’t bring ‘change’………
THE EFFICIENT DOCTOR
If your mum was a nurse as a kid, I’m officially sorry for you.This part is not for you because, I’m sure
you’ve been through a lot.Yes, Nigerian nurses are known to shout at sick patients, hold stubborn children well for injections and ensure all drugs are
All Nigerian mums are nurses, quote me anywhere!
Often times you overhear their conversation with the doctor in the
DOCTOR: Madam, ensure that she takes the full prescription in the right dosage.
SUPER MUM: Doctor, I can handle her, leave that to me!
LIST OF THINGS MUMS HATE
1)That Round Leather Object called
‘football‘- She probably bought you your first ball but that was years ago when you knew nothing. Once you grow up and are big enough to play it with friends or you are going out to the fields to play, it
becomes her enemy. She is ready to locate you in that field while you’re at the post as the keeper and drag you by the ear with
your socks and boots back home to knee down, raise up your arms and close your eyes.(plus ruin your budding street career)
2)Video Games and All Games Infact-
Even when you are on a long vacation, shecan’t leave you in peace to enjoy your football video games, racing games and (those days) Street Fighters and Mortal Kombat. Don’t be decieved! She’s the greatest villain you have to defeat while playing these games!
To her, these games are a waste of time. She will often ask “Jide, is this the only thing you do when you wake up in the morning? ”. It’s better to keep quiet at the
moment and act sober when she asks you. Any reply to defend yourself will lead to, “Oya, pack up that game with the game pad and keep in my room now!”. Begging may even lead to whipping. And please, it is not just video games, this extends to Whot, Jackpot, Ludo, Draft. Many-a-whots have been burnt or decapitated by mums. They favour scrabble though…
3)All Music Videos and ‘Corrupt’ Movies-
We didn’t have Lady Gaga then or Rihanna going topless (God knows what children now are facing) but we had Shaba Ranks and his women, Patra, Snoop Dogg and his ‘evil’ dancers, and later Jennifer Lopez,
Mariah Carey. Sexy women of the era, beloved by all, except mums! The moment they catch a glimpse of these ‘half naked’ women, it’s like seeing Satan with all his hosts approaching. You’d be asked to ‘switch off that telly’ or even worse ‘Change it to the network news’
You better be on the alert when watching movies, ready to fast forward because if that man and woman in that film try to ‘near’ each other as if to kiss and you’re not fast enough to fast forward it………..
4)The neighbour’s kids – She smiles with them all the time and calls them pet names but once you start going to their house too much to play, they become the
enemy, “Where are you going, John” she blocks you at the door.
“To Emeka’s house”
“To do what?”, before you answer she says
in a low voice(so they don’t hear)
“Come on! Will you sit down! Is your own
house scratching you?”
NIGERIAN MUMS AND SEX EDUCATION
The word, ‘sex’ and ‘education’ standing next to each other is suspect to the ears of Nigerian mothers. Sadly, for many, what they learnt about sex is mostly from
magazines, television or friends at school. Ask mums anything about sex, they become alarmed and ask,
“Where did you learn that from?”
When the time is ripe for you to know
(that is, when you must have done so many bad things already), they sit you down and tell you something so basic.
GIRLS- “…when you start seeing that blood and you. meet a man, you will get pregnant and when you
get pregnant, that is the end of your life oh”
FOR BOYS-”DON’T DARE IMPREGNATE ANY GIRL AND BRING HER HERE FOR ME AND YOUR DAD TO TRAIN!”
For the overly serious folks that will read this and conclude that I am ‘portraying the Nigerian mothers’ as bullies. Far from that! We all love them, don’t we?
However, let’s not call it bullying, let’s call it ‘home training’.
Tags; uncle steve, naija mums, FMB,bully,lady gaga, Mariah Carey, Shaba Ranks, Rihanna, Patra, Whoop Dogg, sex
Twitter handle; @dahliadona
Monday, March 10, 2014
Are you are out of your depth ?
A lot of times, especially early on in our businesses, we look for clients in the wrong places.
Make sure you are talking to your ideal client, and not just anybody who may need what you offer, but may not be able to afford it. Other tips to grow your small business are:
1. Prepare a detailed profile of your ideal client , it would give you a clearer picture of even your own business and then search for people who fit the bill.
2. Make your services easy to use and also easily accessible.
3. Have a healthy social media presence, start with the basics, facebook, twitter, instagram ,pinterest and LinkedIn amongst others.
4. Strive to improve people’s lives through better service, innovation and value.
5. Know your mission and let your business live by it.
6. Get the basic structure right from the very beginning.
7. Build strong relationships with such suppliers,vendors, financiers and business associates generally.
8. Truly listen to your customers , find out what
they want and give it to them!i
Tags; FMB,Business, peggyzplace.
Twitter handle :@dahliadona
Friday, March 7, 2014
My name is Chidimma, and I am a nurse.
Also known as the ‘smily one’, I graduatedfrom the University of Nigeria Nsukka, and I love my profession, because it enables
me do what I love doing, which is caring for others! People depend on me for support, advice, encouragement and help; and
above all, my selfless sacrifice of my skills,knowledge, time, talents and professionalism saves, as well as restores wholeness and worth to lives-what more could I ask for?
I also love writing! My inspiration comes mainly from my numerous experiences as a nurse, especially as these experiences breathe and live- to me, of course!; and are a part of my life. I am going to allow you a peek into one of these experiences, and to allow you share my world, simply doing what I love doing- nursing! I have titled this experience of mine:
PUT TO REST THE FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN
It had been a busy day. The health centre had that buzzing sound peculiar to the honey bee in the process of honey production. The lingering aroma of sweat,antiseptic and medicine still hung slightly in
the air, and the overhead fan was responsible for the spread somewhat. A little child, who was still been given a ‘late- dose’ measles vaccine, sent up a piercing
cry as the needle pricked her skin indifferently, whilst performing its function. The child was hushed consistently by her mother and the attendant nurse.
Seated in the nurses’ station, I had finally come to the conclusion that I was spent.Dog-tired.
I had tried forcing my mind to think of some other function to carry out, but in alliance with my body, my mind hadalso decided it was tired. Talk about your
mind having a will of its own! Then I saw her. Or rather, them. Two young women. I suspected that both were in their twenties. The woman who I had first seen, was big. No. The word was huge. She walked with careless abandon and a tilt to her shoulders more like in a masculine stride. She seemed to be in
charge, as her right hand was placed slightly behind her on her counterpart’s arm, in a drag, urging her to follow along.
The other woman was small-no,not Chinhuahua-small, but she could be what one could term ‘average’ in height. She was a fair-skinned beauty, and had more
grace and feminity to her steps. Walking behind her huge counterpart, she was literarily been dragged inside the health centre. Her eyes kept scanning the corners of the health centre, more or less sending the message ‘What am I doing here?’ They both walked up to me. The huge one released her hand off her counterpart’s arm.
“Nurse, good evening”. The huge one said.
“Good evening and welcome. What can I do for you?’
The huge one leaned closer. Her large frame swallowed more than half the width of the table, and her scent enveloped me.”I need to talk to you in private”. She said, almost in a whisper. I smiled. I had had only a few of these ‘talking-in-private’ encounters, and most times, it was literarily nothing-merely fear
speaking.”Ok, let’s go somewhere private’I said, as I forcefully willed my dog-tired body to stand. I really was tired, but what else could I do? I took them to the
treatment room, which was ‘private’, as it was.
As we entered the treatment room, the fair-skinned one hesitated, and then in a hurried, shaky voice said “Ehm..nurse..I think will wait outside,i'd just wait outside till you’re done with Ify”. Ify, who was the
huge one, turned and gave a disapproving look.”Biko, Chinwe, what are you afraid of? Come let’s go in nah”
I smiled at both of them.”Don’t worry Ify, when I’m done with you, Chinwe’ll come in too. And so, leaving an undecided and frightened Chinwe outside, I and Ify entered the room.
Ify sat down from across me. After making a quick survey of the treatment room, to be extremely certain it was ‘private’ and ‘safe’, she blurted out “Nurse, I want to.know my HIV status”. Just that? Finally! I had initially wondered what had caused all the drama.
‘Ok,’ I responded in relief, ‘but is that the only thing?’
“Ehm..no ooo..Nurse, if I am HIV-negative, could I get a receipt?’
A receipt? Or maybe she meant a
laboratory result.“What for? HIV tests are free”.
“Nurse, the thing is, I and Chinwe are getting married in a month’s time, and we need to give these receipts-sorry, results to our husbands-to-be, as proof that we
are ‘safe’ sexually.” “Safe”, sexually? Little wonder the fright on Chinwe’s face!. “Would your husbands- to-be take this test?”
Ify gave a sarcastic laugh “For where? As far as they are concerned, they don’t need the tests, once they are ‘good-to-go’.
Please nurse, let’s do these tests now. I and Chinwe need to go somewhere else. But promise me you won’t tell anyone what the results are, not even Chinwe.”
I smiled. I cleaned the tip of her thumb with a cotton wool swab soaked in methylated spirit, and then, I pricked her thumb with the blood lancet.
“Ewo o! she shrieked in pain.
“Sorry. And I won’t tell anyone about your results”, I replied. “But we don’t give receipts or results, for HIV testing. So, I will. just tell you what your results are, and that would be all. While we waited for the results, I began counseling her on HIV, AIDs, mode of transmission, management of the disease, and all relating to the disease. I also insisted that her husband-to-be come for the tests, and that she needed to come
back after three months, for a re-test if her results were negative. And then I looked at the test strip, for the results.
“Nurse, what is it? Tell me ooo..am I going to die?”.I looked at her.“Ify, the results of
your test is out, and…”
“And what?” she shouted, as she rubbed her palms vigorously together, and grippedmy uniform.“Nurse, tell me if I’m going to die nah...tell me…”
“You are HIV-negative”.
The whole world seemed to stand still. And then, finally, Ify began to dance. She pulled me into an embrace, lifted me off the ground, and said ‘thank you, God bless you’, a number of times, before dropping me. Then she straightened herself, and with a renewed confidence and beaming smile, walked up to the door and literarily shouted “Chinwe fear fear, nurse dey call you oo”. I laughed.
“Don’t forget to come back after three months”, I called after her. I hoped she had heard me.
Chinwe timidly entered the treatment room, and after reassuring and counseling her, I carried out the same routine as I had done for Ify. When the results came out, she was also HIV negative. But she was more dramatic. She burst into tears, and started raining blessings on me. She danced and danced, and danced; and told me that she had been so scared because she had been promiscuous. Then she offered me some money in appreciation, which I politely declined. I counselled her on the ABC’s of sex; and reminded her to come back in three months time for a retest. Then I documented.
Finally, I saw my two patients/friends off, up to the gates of the health centre. They collected my mobile number, and promiseduto invite me specially to their weddings. And as I watched them walk away in confidence, I wondered what would have happened if any of them had turned up HIV-positive…
Your guess is as good as mine...disaster!
Thanks for been a part of my world, and watch out for THE NURSE’S DIARY NOTES!-
Thursday, March 6, 2014
"Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy." - Norman Vincent Peale
Motivation is a very powerful force, in fact some times more powerful than physical strength or ability, a man with a cheerful spirit, or that is been cheered on, has more energy reserve than one that is physically stronger but depressed. In my opinion weare all in need of cheerleaders at every stage of life, sometimes it could be our spouses, our children, a friend, a mentor, a colleague or even just the guy next door.
There was a fire in the big city, and the firemen flung their ladders together, and went up in their brave fashion to the very topmost story to rescue the people that were trapped. One after another was rescued by the brave firemen. Had all been rescued? it seemed. But no!
As the firemen looked up they saw a white face at the highest window of the burning building. They wrapped something about one of their firemen, and, daring the fierce flames, he went again to that window, and put a robe around the little woman and started down. Then they saw him tremble as the fire raged around him, and it seemed as though he would fall with this precious burden, but the fire chief who knew that nothing technically could be done to help him, cried to his men: “Cheer him, boys! Cheer him, boys!” And they
cheered him with words of encouragement as he came down with the precious life saved.
It was Mark Twain that said “The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up”. A broken spirit can achieve very little, the simple truth may be that all you require to come out of your present situation is a little cheerleading, better still why not become someone else’s cheerleader today and you will never become overwhelmed with depression. Consider the words of the master Jesus
"These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world
Twitter handle ; @dahliadona
The thing is, Nigerian mums are a very rare specie of humans. Wonderful people.
Special case study.
They are not all the same but I tell you, they have common traits, sometimes you think they plan it because how else is it that when you were growing up, you go to your friend’s house and hear his mum shouting about the same exact things your mum shouts about, in the same exact way, and when you adjust your eye to watch the tv as if you never heard anything, his mum turns to you,“Don’t you advise your friend? Paul is a very lazy boy” She turns to your friend and says, “John! Look at your friend, how quiet he is. See your life!”.Next week, your friend is in your house and your mum is screaming,“Emeka! Look at John! Does he have two heads?…..”PLEASE, did they plan it?
THE NAIJA MUM’S MOST VALUED TOOL?
Answer: Something long and painful.
Before I continue this exposé, I’d like to point out that there is a tool employed by these women that makes their job easier. A companion, often seen under beds and under the chairs in sitting rooms of unsuspecting kids.
The Whip! Yikes! Those days, there was no house without this ‘commodity’. In the past, it could be in the form of a small stick or the stalk of a tree in your compound plucked during emergency times. Later, as we grew up, they started making them in commercial
quantity! You go to the shop of any Mallam or even ‘provision’ stores and you see it piled in one corner, bound together by one rubber band (Infact this made me seriously hate one Mallam Aminu those days- a true friend to many mothers back then)
The thing is, this whip can land on your
back for any to no reason at all;
“Have you done your assignment? I say, have you done your assignment?” *whip whip*
“So two times eight is eighteen ehhh……”
“Joy, so you are now following bad gangs”
“Abu, who told you to go and pluck those
This *whip whip* is almost always the
aftermath of any conversation that starts
(Act 1; Scene 1)
MUM: You are here watching tv, have you
finished your food?
CHILD: Mummy, I don’t like eba, I want to
drink tea and bread/cake
MUM: This night? (getting really angry and
CHILD: Mummy, I don’t like this food!
(Act 1; Scene 2)
You don’t need to be Shakespeare to know
what happens next!!
Or when your mum sees you and your
elder brother fighting and says “Wait for
me!” while she hurriedly makes her way
into her room……..hmmmmmm.
NAIJA MUMS AND PUBLIC PLACES
We all know that Nigerian mums cannot differentiate between public places and indoors when it comes to disciplining the kids. They seldom care if the neighbours hear the loud strokes of cane metted out on the poor child. This explains why when you’re in church and refuse to open your mouth to sing with the choir or if you attend these 'fire’ churches; you don’t stamp your foot, close your eyes and speak out your prayer points loudly or you find yourself nodding off
while kneeling down in a night vigil.
What do you hear next on your back? A loud rasp that
startles you back to the real world! Some call it ‘abara’, some call it ‘reality check’ while others call it ‘hard
reset’….What ever name you choose to call it, this tumultuous blow to your back can spoil your career on the streets or in school because, eww! Your street girls were also in church that day! Or Tola, that girl from your class attends your church too and everyone will hear about it before you enter class tomorrow… Oh Lord!
This above stated reason is why children hate to sit near mum in church; Or to suddenly see her crossing the street on her way out while you’re busy playing with friends. She may suddenly know at that moment that the afternoon plates are not washed and ruin your ‘street credibility’ immediately! Oh lord!
NAIJA MUMS AND MONDAY MORNING
Psychological analysis have shown that some of our phobias and things we extremely hate are unknowingly borne out of ‘horrible’ childhood memories. We all hate Monday morning!! This fear indeed was awakened in us by no other person than……..? Your guess is as good as mine! After the precious weekend that shouldn’t have ended at all, who wakes us up in the ‘ungodly hours’ of the morning? Who flogs us back to reality when we pretend to be praying that early morning meanwhile we are dozing off? Who asks us in a loud voice whether we are sure we have done our weekend assignment while our eyes are still tingling with sleep?
Who canes our behinds when she realises that we have not ironed our clothes throughout the weekend and now there’s no light? I say, who do all these? I’ve told you, your guess is as good as mine!
NAIJA MUMS AND SATURDAY MORNING
Oh! She’s at your door again!
FOOD FOR THOUGHT: Do you know that it is a crime, punishable by ‘shouting’ or flogging or both, to wake up even five minutes after your mum on a Saturday
morning? Ponder on this! (But while you’re pondering), if this is a Saturday morning, kindly take the nearest sponge and go and wash the plates before another thing will land on you! And we all know that weekend plates are the hardest to wash. Your daddy can never be nice enough to eat rice with only one plate! There is plate for the stew, one for the rice and one for mixing! And visitors too! Those horrid vipers! You do all the work for them yet you get chased from the TV you’re watching because they want to engage in ‘adult talk’. Well, Saturday morning is the ultimate misery for any child growing up. You work and work! After washing and scrubbing, the Nigerian mum is never content with this work, you find yourself starting all over again at some point. The most painful part was the days of Cadbury Breakfast Television and Spiderman cartoons, my dear! Try to put on the TV on Saturday morning. Just try it
CHRONICLES OF NAIJA MUMS ( PART TWO)
Catch ya!!! Xoxoxo
Twitter handle @dahliadona.
P.s blogging might be irregular for a while. Pleas bear with me. School ain't giving me a breathing space. Love you muchos.
Saturday, February 8, 2014
Ade and Mike have been great buddies since their high school days. Both are in their late 20's, living together in the US and are known homosexuals. Ade's familly reunion that is scheduled to hold in Nigeria happens to be a problem for the two of them because they stand the risk of serving jail term or even getting lynched by a mob for their sexual preference.
The Nigerian government signed the anti-gay rights bill into law and this law could be summarised as follows: That anyone found/caught carrying out homosexual acts would be liable to 14years in prison and also that any person that supports or is a member of gay organisations, associations or club is liable to 10years in prison. The law became effective this year and since then there have raids in which gay people are apprehended mostly in the Northern part of the country. There have also been cases of suspected gay people being lynched. I saw a clip sometime last year in which three University students suspected to be lesbians were stripped and forced to perform sexual acts on themselves in oublic. The International community have frowned at this step taken by the Nigerian government while there are even rumours of some countries threatening to stop giving aids to Nigeria but many Nigerians are of the opinion that homosexuality is unafrican or to be specific 'unnigerian' and that is why gay people in this part of the world seems to be ill-treated.
A few weeks back, former boxing champion Evander Holyfield stated that being gay is not normal and can be fixed and a greater number of the American population started sounding their 'trumpet of criticism'. As criticisms keep pouring in and as more world citizens continue to add their voice to the subject, I think this is like a clarion call to behavioural scientists to conduct experiments on the possibility of psychotherapy as a means of checking homosexuality. Some Nigerians believe that homosexuality is more spiritual than physical, although I am not disputing their view, I believe homosexuality is more behavioural than spiritual. They shouldn't be locked up like the Nigerian government is doing at the moment or lynched as have
been witnessed in some areas but rather they should be HELPED.
Homosexuality is not a medical condition or like some would say 'I was born this way'. No, not that at all. I believe it is more of a mindset thing, more like an experiment carried out by a young child or an adolescent which later turns into a habit and then is forming or has formed the person's character. Someone argued that just like alcohol and drug addicts undergo rehabilitation and become free, gay people should be rehabilitated too.(The prison could be said to be a form of rehabilitation but I don't think the same could be said of Nigerian prisons) As dumb or silly as that argument is to some, I believe there is an iota of truth in it and that just like Holyfield opined, it can be fixed. I am of the opinion that if those 'gay moments' are noticed in a child early, some form of psychotherapy put in place, it could be checked and then maybe the child would grow up to be 'normal'.
Let's put a stop to gay lynching and imprisonment and look at the possibility of psychotherapy as a means of helping this set of people.
Ikeji, Victor C. Is a writer, blogger and a
lover of 'sofia'. He tweets from
@victorikeji . He blogs from
Monday, January 20, 2014
Last week after a refreshing time out with friends,we decided to watch a movie and one of the girls
suggested a nollywood movie. I objected but was overruled by the majority, so I kept mute and sat down. I don’t have anything against Nollywood but for what it’s worth I admire the resilence of the practitioners who have trudged on with basically no support or structure.
So I tried to keep an open mind about it and enjoy the movie but I couldn’t, it was the same story I had seen a million times; man is broke, man goes for money rituals, man becomes rich, man marries a girl, she can’t have kids, man’s mother comes from the village to torment her for “chopping my son’s money"...etc. At this point l clamped my big mouth lest I get stoned by my friends who were enjoying the movie, and my mind drifted away.
I remembered a TED speech given by my favourite Nigerian writer Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie on “the danger of a single story”. In the speech she essentially was talking about how it’s wrong to judge a person or a people by a single story that we have about them. This single story is just one side to them and certainly doesn’t capture their whole essence. Then I started thinking about how we often complain about the unbalanced reportage of Africa by the western media, but then using our own media and outlets have we
been telling a balanced story of us? Or are we guilty of the same thing that we accuse the foreign media of?
I totally agree that movies should somewhat be culturally relevant, but all there is to Nigeria is rituals? Aristoism? Mother-in-laws tormenting their son’s wives? And people being poisoned? So why are we telling a single story of ourselves. I reckon with people like Emem Isong,Blessing Efiom, and a few who have raised the bar with content but still majority of these movies dwell on the themes I mentioned above. These things do happen,but we have told these stories for too long, there are other stories that we can tell and sell too and make some money as well.
It was said that the renowned late activist Funmilayo Ransome-Kuti floated a political party and at a point even ran for prime minister. I have imagined a movie about her life with an iconic actress playing the lead role. Tell me, would this make sense or not?. Do I talk about the legendary love story of Late Dim Odumegwu Ojukwu and his wife Bianca? Why is it not a movie yet?. The Yar’Adua sickness debacle is a block buster movie waiting to be made. So you see my point, there are other stories to tell besides the ones we are telling currently.
There is a new crop of writers of Nigerian origin, many of which are gaining international recognition,because of the stories they tell about this same Nigeria. Each paints a different but true picture on his/her canvass and the world is beginning to Sit up and look. In another country a book like ‘Things fall apart’ would have been made into a movie several times, we even had to wait for Hollywood to come make a movie out of “Half of a yellow sun” by Chimamanda and in typical Nigerian fashion we had to complain about our actors not getting the lead roles. Nollywood has a lot of jokers, but it also has a lot of very talented people who can really bring it.
These people are often under utilized by the kind of scripts we hand to them. We should stop telling these single stories, there is so much more that we can talk about.
As my mind drifts back to the movie, the mother-in-law ( I am sure you can guess who) is standing
in front of a large mirror chanting incantations, an image of the sons wife appears and she raises a knife……I just got up and left to get myself a drink.
Tags;FMB,Nollywood,fabulous guy,Chimamanda Adichie,Funmilayo Ransome-Kuti,Emem Isong,Blessing Efiom,Yar'adua,Dim.O.Ojukwu,Bianca Ojukwu.
Twitter handle @dahliadona
Friday, January 17, 2014
Earlier on this year,I found that one of my friends had just moved to somewhere close to me so my
cousin and I decided to go and chill there. I was very excited because it was a new place to go
to faf about, play video games and drink red wine. The first thing that hit me when I stepped into the flat
was the mess. There were clothes strewn everywhere, empty soda cans in the hallway and the plates in the sink were so dirty, the food
remnants had caked. While I tried really hard not to judge him for being a little pig, my cousin who
had the self-control of a four year old burst out on our way home; “Ahn ahn! But junior has a
girlfriend na! Why was that place so dirty like that? Doesn’t she go there every time?” I thought about it long and hard. It was a tricky one;
one minute you’re being all “domestic” cleaning his flat, washing plates because you just can’t stand dirty places and the next minute you’re being tagged as “Playing Wifey”. I completely forgot
about that situation until last week
when one of the guys in my neighborhood exclaimed “When
girls say they don’t want anything SERIOUS don’t believe them oh!”. He went on to to lament about
how one babe was “slowly worming her way into my house, bringing bath mat because she doesn’t want me to slip and last week it was mop
and mop bucket! Abeg I don’t want”
I was shocked! How do you know she’s not just being caring? she doesn’t want you to fall and hit
your knuckle head on the bath. Duh! My friend Isi is one of the sweetest people on earth. If
she meets you today, she’d be looking for ways to help you and shower you with as much love as
possible whether you’re a boy or a girl.
A lot of people say women don’t know what they want but sometimes men confuse me! You don’t carry their plate to the kitchen, it means you’re not a “wife material”. You don’t make stew when you come on holiday from jand “You’re not caring”. You bring wine glasses because you’re tired of drinking out of cheap plastic cups “you’re trying to invade my space”. You’re arranging the house because honestly you can’t stand the mess, it is automatically translated to “you’re trying to make yourself too comfortable”
Honestly I’m confused. How many “yards” of wife material” is one supposed to possess that will fit just right?
On the other hand there are some
women who really see it as all part of being a strategy. For some of them it pays off, but in other cases you hear sob stories of “After I
washed his brother’s boxers he went and married that Jennifer”.
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Monday, January 13, 2014
essences of life as God, love, respect, forgiveness, happiness and all good things that make life worth living but egocentric
individuals have made us wonder whether such essences are worth holding on to.
Most times, we feel that it is time to stop being heroes of peace [for our names most likely are not Gandhi or Mandela] and now
become villains to the courses we once championed. Imagine how man ruins his fellow man. How pathetic!
However, pausing for a while to look at the kind of life we want to plunge into, it makes us come back to our senses and realize that it is not worth it - being a villain of God, love, respect, forgiveness, happiness is drastic and makes us an enemy of all, both mortal and immortal. This realization makes us feel frustrated, for the good men we are does not pay us
and to be bad is certainly not right, and we cannot but let raindrops stream out of our eyes. How sad! But, on a closer look on the issue, I realize that there is no cause to be sad for the conclusion of the whole matter is thus: Follow peace with ALL men forgetting all wrongs done, overlooking all offences
because life is too short to form clouds for teardrops. Do good to all, spare no one until such a time when respect will be reciprocal (that will most probably not
happen here but in the world yonder)
Written by Gideon Chukwu
Friday, January 10, 2014
This style is one of my favourite!
POLISHED FADE :
This slick hairstyle is polished and devilishly handsome. The style. mostly comes from the cut and is easy to maintain at home.
How To Style:
1)Visit a good saloon
2)Apply a small amount of coconut butter to hair and scalp or any soft good cream.
3)Brush hair forward with a boar bristle brush.
Face Shape and Hair Density:
This style is perfect for any face shape and hair density. Round,squared,oblong name it.
You can make the top curly or wavy you know! For a statement
I know this brings back the memories of Kate Hudson and Matt Forever-Shirtless McConaughey. That was one movie I really loved but does it really take ten days to lose a lousy son of Adam? Let me present to you the best ways to accomplish this feat in 60 seconds.
1. EAT OLD-SCHOOL STYLE.
Eat with your mouth. Loud noises and grunts of enjoyment are all encouraged. Do not hesitate to
pick at that stubborn piece of meat stuck between your teeth with your fingers. Lick your lips after every bite. Gargle after every swallow.
Palm oil smears, etc, etc. You go, girl!!!
2. TELL LIES.
As in those bold-faced kind of lies. You see, men are so used to lying with stealth and crafty cunning that it completely unnerves them
to run into someoney who lies without tact.
3. TELL ALL.
You see, nothing intrigues us more than what we don'tknow. Why do you think we spend all ourtime taking things apart? Exercise
your right to free speech until you become extremely “un-mysterious” and boring.Does he really need to know what color your snot is when
you blow your nose? Yes, my friend, he does.
Cry all the time. Cry even when there’s absolutely nothing to cry about. Just cry. Cry blood. This one
is very simple. There is just something about the tears of a woman that turns bodyguard
Samson to mai’guard Mukaila. Powerful stuff.
5. BE AVAILABLE.
The trick to being available is
to be there for him at every hour! He awakes you from a lusty dream at four in the morning, demanding breakfast to be delivered to his
house which is fifteen miles away? You’ll be there. He needs his laundry done at six the next morning? You’ll be there. He needs you to wipe his ass after a particularly grueling battle with the toilet seat? You’ll be thereeeeee, won’t you? Stick to this and his “isn’t-she-so-sweet-selfless-and-
caring?” cliche. will be transformed to “but-really-what-kind-of-ode-is-this?” in no time.
6. KISS LIKE A WATERSPOUT.
Be a gushing fountain– be copious and overly generous in your offering of spittle. Deliver beyond your fair share. After all, the well
of saliva is always in abundance, it never runneth out.
Well, what if you have exhausted this very promising list of options? What if you have a Die- Hard Part XIII on your hands? You can choose to kiss and tell or cheat and flaunt.
I'm outta here.
Disclaimer; This article was written by kayode for favourmoyse blog and it a work of fantasy.We cannot
be held responsible for any adverse actions brought about by a faithful subscription to the ideals published in this article. Be wise
Tags; Favourmoyse,Kswaggs,BN,kate Hudson,Matt McConaughey.
Twitter handle :@dahliadona
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Hello people!!! I'm sharing this with you my lovely readers .enjoy!!!
Things you need:
1. A perforator or any puncher 2.Ankara fabric (half a yard would do)
3. Aluminum chain or jewelry
4. Coral beads (the spiky ones)
5. Office pins
6.Glue (E6000 or UHU would do just fine)
7. Fabric stay
8.A pair of scissors.
1. Tape measure
1. Spread open your clutch, position the fabric whatever way you want (here I chose to work with the diagonal shapes and positioned them evenly on both
sides.) Do same for sides of the clutch.
2. With a chalk or pen mark out the
edges of you clutch on the fabric.
3. Cut out, but leave about an extra inch of fabric around the marking so you have something to fold later (you'll need that!)
4. Fold neatly along your markings and press with a hot iron to
hold in place, and with the same hot iron, press your fabric stay to the fabric to ensure thickness. (don't forget to cut out a hole for the clasp or you'll find that you wont be able to snap your clutch in place.) Do same for the sides
of the clutch.
5. Spread glue evenly across the surface of your clutch, and place you fabric over it, pressing gently.
Smoothen out the fabric so there are no folds glued in place.
6. Puncture holes on the flap to insert your jewelry into.
7. Sew in (with a needle and thread) your spikes – here i used coral beads to achieve a 'spiky' look because I wanted an overall african look. (optional – sew the clutch all round with a decorative, embroidered stitch.) You should have something like this:
Readers can write in to let me know
what they would like to see created and the most requests for a piece would be treated.
Okay today I will be writing a post on how to look good as a man!
You don't need to apply blush or
mascara to look like a hunk! A simple hair cut can transform you from ordinary to a sexy CEO!
Even if you don't have the money now you can look it!!! Who knows it might bring opportunities your way! Nobody wanna work with dreads-beard guy,and most ladies don't dig them either.
So today's HAIR CUT is:
CLEAN AND SHORT
How To Style:
1)Go to a nice saloon with a good
barber and tell him the style.
2)Apply a scalp and hair cream or
spotting waves then brush hair with a boar bristle brush.
Face Shape and Hair Density:
This style is perfect for any face shape and hair density.
Try using a small amount of coconut oil to moisturize both the hair and scalp and apply a nice perfume!
I will write on my favourite hair style tomorrow! Mehn that hair cut can make any guy look like an adonis!!
It was spring but it was summer I wanted
The warm days, and the great outdoors.
It was summer,but it was fall I wanted
The colorful leaves and the cool dry air.
It was fall, but it was winter I wanted
The beautiful snow and the joy of the holiday season.
I was a child, but it was adulthood I wanted
The freedom and they respect.
I was 20, but it was 30 I wanted
To be mature and sophisticated.
I was middle-aged,but it was 20 I wanted
The youth and the free spirit.
I was retired,but it was middle- aged I wanted
The presence of mind without limitations.
My life was over
But I never got what I wanted.
Tags ; FMB, Jason Lehman.
twitter handle ;@dahliadona
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
If your pastor is the same age or younger than your husband yet you refer to him as ‘sir’ and
don’t use the same for your husband, something is wrong with you…
If you courtesy, as in kneel as a sign of respect for your pastor and don’t do the same for your husband, something is wrong with you…
If your husband tells you something and you ignore it till your pastor says the same thing,
something is wrong with you…
If you talk anyhow to your wife and give respect to your pastor,something is wrong with
If you are a pastor, deacon or church worker and you prioritize church work over your household,
something is wrong with you…
If you would rather take money to the church than to show your responsibility at home,
something is wrong with you…
If you call someone who does not know your phone number, bb pin, home address or even just your first name, daddy, mummy or
spiritual daddy/mummy, hmm, something is wrong with you…
If you talk more about your pastor than about JESUS, something is wrong with you…
If you think it is all right for your pastor to be protected by security guards while no one protects you, something is wrong with you…
If you think something is wrong with me, you are right, what it is, is I am tired of seeing people act
like it’s ok to be gullible…culled.
Tags; emmy collins, dacosta lawrence,june, FMB.
Sunday, January 5, 2014
Favourmoyse blog requires guest bloggers/ writers. Are you a professional Writer or a wannabe? Submit your articles via firstname.lastname@example.org. Articles should be on fashion,lifestyle,health, relationship, family, humor et al except gossip.
Our team strives to be a source of inspiration and support to our readers. Thanks
After the wind,came the earthquake followed by a fire but only in a still small voice did God speak to Elijah. Sometimes God does not reveal himself in mighty acts,but in simple everyday activities that we could easily take for granted.
So sometime ago I was feeling misunderstood and my hormones were all over the place plus I couldn't confide in anyone. I spoke words of faith and prayed, but the darkness lingered.On my way home one night I noticed the moon. I mean the full moon!!! it was so bright my path was illuminated I didn't even need a flashlight. At that moment I knew it was the Lord reminding me of his presence and nearness.
It was a very tangible demonstration of his love and I felt normal afterwards. The lord is always near us but sometimes we often miss it because we expect him to show up in great and mighty ways. It may be through something as common as the smile of a stranger or the laughter or spontaneous hug from your child.
It could even be you getting home just before the rain starts or receiving a call from a loved one.
Regardless of how small it is,don't take the everyday mundane for granted. Because somewhere in these insignificant things God may just be whispering "I love you and want you to know i'm always close by".
Tags ; sisterskeeper, june, FMB
Have you suffered from flaky, itchy scalp?Don´t worry, you are not alone and the best part is that there are many natural anti dandruff remedies that will help you to get rid of them once and for all. Sensitive, flaky scalp is one of the main causes of dandruff. Check out these 5 very interesting natural anti-dandruff remedies:
1. CHAMOMILE TEA RINSE
People with sensitive skin often suffer from dry, flaky scalp as well and since there is no yeast overgrowth or dermatitis you need to cure in this case, all you’ll
have to do is focus on moisturizing and soothing your poor scalp
with the anti-inflammatory and soothing effects of chamomile tea, apply after washing your hair, and
wash out with warm water.
2. APPLE CIDER VINEGAR AND HYDROGEN PEROXIDE
One of the best natural anti dandruff remedies ever, this is
because both vinegar and peroxide have anti-fungal and
anti-bacterial properties that deal with yeast overgrowth, which is one of the most frequent causes of
dandruff. Mix the peroxide solution (harmless 3% solution) with vinegar and clean, filtered water (1 part peroxide, 1 part
vinegar, 10 parts water), apply it on your scalp, and leave
it for 15 minutes before rinsing.
3. TEA TREE OIL
Tea tree oil helps control excess sebum and, when mixed with Aloe Vera oil in the 1:1 ratio, creates
one of the most potent natural anti dandruff remedies, try it yourself.
4. BAKING SODA
Wash your hair with baking soda,also known as bicarbonate, it is an alkaline solution which raises
the PH value of your scalp, making it less acidic and, therefore, not
the ideal place for yeast to thrive in.
There is one more thing yeast lovesjust as much as acidic places in your body – sugar! Including
onions into your diet might work wonders.
Saturday, January 4, 2014
When i stumbled on some of these names few days ago, l had to look for others. All na packaging sha. So here are english names of naija dishes/ snacks.
1. Kuli kuli – Peanut bars
2. Donkuwa/ Robo Alata – Hot Charcolit nuts
3. Kilichi – Beef Crackers
4. Dundun/fried yam – Yamarita
5. Fried Potato – Potarita
6. Pako (Chewing stick) – Dental Sticks
7. Boli – Barbecue Plantain
8. Roasted corn – Corn Aflame
9. Eko/Agidi – Corn Jellos
10. Moin moin – Bean pie
11. Isi ewu – Goat-hedo lickins’
12. Garri – Grain o’ fibres
13. Bokoto/ Nkwobi – Hoof salad
14. Ogi/Akamu – Corn Caramel
15. Kpof kpof – Energy Buns
16. Chin chin – Dough Rocks
17. Zobo – Juice Rosa Afrik
18. Kunnu – Grain Alive
19. Bread and Akara – Bean cake Burger
20. Ofada rice – Unpolished Rice for
21. Adalu(corn & beans) – Lentils & Grain
22. Ifokore (yam porrige) – Continental Yam
23. Agbalumo – Wild Robust Cherry.
Now you know, knowledge is power. Thank me later.
twitter handle ;@dahliadona
Friday, January 3, 2014
FRESHLY MADE HOME COOKIES
FLOUR - 500g
SUGAR - 200g
BUTTER - 250g
POWDERED MILK (OPTIONAL)
1. Put all the dry ingredients in a bowl i.e. the flour, sugar and powdered milk
2. Add butter and use finger tips to rub-in the butter until the mixture looks like crumbs
3. Add flavour of your choice; you could try making use of Rayner's Butter Scotch. lt tastes good in cookies.
3. Add water but you have to watch out for the water as the water must not be too much; the mixture should be like the one you get while making a meatpie.
4. Spread out on a table and roll out with a rolling pin
5. when you get an equal diameter and.thickness, place the cookies cutter and cut out (there are actually bigger cutter)
6. Oil the oven tray
7. Place the already cut out cookies inside the tray
8. Put in the oven
9. Now depending on the oven; can bake for like 40-45mins at about 120degree celsius.
Tags ;FMB,Eya .A.,Aj
Yesterday we wrote the first article on deception. Here is the concluding part.
Lies spotting; there are two patterns of deception .
1. Verbal Dodging - people who are over determined in their denial will result to formal language. Liars will unconsciously distinct themselves from their subjects using language as a tool.
2. Body Language Slip
No mortal can keep a secret. If his lips are silent he chatters with his fingertips. We think liars won't look at us in the eyes but guess what they look you in the eyes too much just to compensate for that myth. We think warmth and smile conveys honesty but you should know that a real smile reaches the eyes while a fake smile doesn't.
when having a conversation with someone you think is deceptive, an honest person is going to be co-operative,help in getting the truth,willing and even helps in brainstorming; whereas a deceptive person would be withdrawn,look down,jerky,pepper their stories with too much details.
We know liars shift their blink raid,points their feets towards an exit, alter their vocal tone often making it much lower. Here's the deal, these behaviours are just behaviours they are not proof of deception. But when you see clusters of them that's the signal. look,listen,probe, ask some hard questions,get out of the comfortable mood of knowing, walk into curiosity mood.Don't be too aggressive it doesn't work.
Note that over sharing is not honesty. When you combine the science of recognizing deception into the art of looking, probing and listening. You exempt yourself from corraborating a lie.You start up the part of being explicit. You say to everyone around you " hey!!! my world, our world? is going to be an honest one" and the truth is marginalised. When you do that the ground around you starts to shift a little bit and that is the truth.
Tags; TED,FMB,Pamela Mayer.
twitter handle ;@ dahliadona
Thursday, January 2, 2014
Olivia Pope is regarded the best in her field. She and her team are called gladiators in suit. She says her gut is never wrong hence its easy for her to tell when a client is lying. When I first saw its movie trailer 'scandal' coupled with the fact that it was directed by Shonda Rhimes,I just had to see the movie.
Believe it or not you are a liar. We are going to talk about lie spotting to truth seeking and ultimately trust building.
Truth 1; Lying is a co-operative act; a lie has no power whatsoever by its mere utterance, its power emerges when someone else agrees to believe it. l know it may sound as tough love but at some point if you got lied to its because you agreed to. Not all lies are harmful. Sometimes we are willing participants in deception for the sake of social dignity but there are times when we are unwilling participants and that could have dramatic consequences.
2011 saw 997 billion dollars in corporate fraud alone in the united states.That's 7% of revenue. Lies could undermine our security in a country.
According to british authority Henry. O. a con man could undermine the entire banking industry in the whole western world. During an interview he said " everyone is willing to give you something for whatever there are hungry for". We all kind of hate to admit it; we wish we were better husbands, wives,parents, colleaques...lying is an attempt to bridge that gap, to connect our wishes and fantasies to whom we wish we were, how we wish we could be to what we are really like.
On a given day, you may be lied to 10-200 times. In another study,strangers lie 3 times within the first ten minutes of meeting each other, extroverts lie more than introverts, men lie 8times more about themselves,women lie more to protect other people and couples lie in one out of every ten interactions.
Truth 2; We are against lying...but covertly for it. Koko the gorilla was taught sign language as a means of communication. koko once blamed her pet kitten for ripping a sink out of the wall. We are wired to be leaders of the pack. It starts really early, how early? As babies we fake a cry,pause, wait to see who's coming and then go right back to crying. 1 year olds learn concealment,2 year-olds bluffs, 5 year-olds lie outright and manipulate their flaterry, 9 year olds? masters of the cover up. By the time you are in college you lie to your mom in one of every five interactions. And by the time we enter the work world and are bread winners we enter into a world that is filled with spam,digital friends inshort a deception epidemic. One author refers to it as a post truth society. So what do you do?
Tomorrow we will talk about lie spotting . Stay connected .
Tags; TED,Pamela Mayer,FMB
twitter handle ; @dahliadona
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
Yes!!! we made it. Its 2014 our year of visible glory. So with all the Roses's perfume and with all the lights in the world and with all the children's smiless..we wish that all your dreams come true. Like birds, let us leave behind what we didn't need to carry, grudges, sadness, pain,fear and regrets. Life is beautiful. Enjoy it.
From all of us @ FMB we say ;
Thanks to everyone for your support ; Nanya Konwea, Chukwuneke ,belvi, my ardent readers.et al. God bless you big.
Saw this hilarious thread on IG and thought I should share. Enjoy! The responses are very hilarious